Shoes. A simple component of one's attire yet a powerful reminder to me to love. Frustrated by Mahmoud's frequent cancellations and tardy appearances to my Arabic class had me thinking thoughts which were less than Jesus-like. That is, until I saw his shoes. He walked in, clearly feeling ill, slightly discouraged, yet trying to pull himself together enough to teach another lesson. I saw a young man living in desperation, wanting more out of life, getting less.
I was ready to give him the typical lecture of his responsibility to be on time, how my day is valuable, and his duty to come prepared to instruct...it was then I looked down. And there they were on his feet. Two tennis shoes. Black with a red stripe. And it hit me. Hard. He is just like me. Goes out searching for shoes. Ones that are comfortable, in-style, and durable. We are brothers. We are so similar.
Perhaps he is dealing with heartaches I cannot imagine. If I had to walk in his shoes, what would my life be like. Helpless as I see the chaos around me and the futility of my efforts to change it. Wearily teaching Arabic to dumb foreigners for 10 hours a day. Frustratingly trying to make ends meet and realizing this is simply a constant circle with no end in sight. Hopeless as I follow the stringent regulations of man-made religious precepts required to reach God. But his shoes, God, they are like mine. For 40 years in the desert, you kept the shoes of Your people from wearing out. (Deut. 29:5) So keep my love fresh in the spiritual desert of this world. Because inside those shoes are feet with calluses, aches, blisters, arthritis. Did I think of that before? No, because I failed to put myself in his shoes. O God, forgive me for not loving more. Forgive me for getting frustrated at trite things.
How will the world ever see Jesus in me if I only judge, dishonor others, and impose my "rights?" It's not about "my rights" but about His love.
When Jesus showed humility and servanthood at it's finest, He hit the floor, untied those dusty sandals of His disciples, and began washing. Letting the cool water rinse those dirty, disgusting feet that had been cooped up in shoes all day. Drying them with the towel with which He was wearing. And Jesus…no, He didn't care. It wasn't about where those feet had been. What they had done, whether right or wrong. It was about what they needed now. A little attention. A little love. So He served. And then He shared with His disciples, "I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you...if you know these things, blessed are you if you do them." (John 13:15,17)
In that day, even a slave didn't have to untie his master's sandal. This was the ultimate form of humility. Yet this was the One of whom John said, "whose sandal strap I am not worthy to losse." (Luke 3:16) Who else needs love today? Just look at their shoes. You might not know where they've been, but is that the question? Perhaps, we should be more concerned about where they are going...that we intersect their life with love. Life isn't easy. Maybe, they've just been in the desert for 40 years, or maybe they are like Mahmoud…just needing someone who genuinely cares…and loves.
Oh yeah, I nearly forgot…you gotta get down low. It's hard to wash feet standing up.
So, I reading this book by Donald Miller called Blue Like Jazz. There is a section in which he talks about how often we use our love as a bartering chip..we give it freely to those we feel deserve it and whom we like, and we withhold it from those we feel need to change an aspect of themselves, we withhold it to try to get them to change so that they deserve it too. This is what he says:
ReplyDeleteI will love you like God, because of God, mighted by the power of God. I will stop expecting your love, demanding your love, trading for your love, gaming for your love. I will simply love. I am giving myself to you, and tomorrow I will do it again. I supposed the clock itself will wear thin its time before I am ended at this altar of dying and dying again.
God risked Himself on me. I will risk myself on you. And together, we will learn to love, and perhaps then, and only then, understand this gravity that drew Him, unto us.
I have read and re-read this hundreds of times in the last week, and it's been my prayer, that I may simply love and pour love into EVERY SINGLE PERSON that I encounter, that I won't judge or talk about or talk down to a single person in my life. Because this will force people to ask questions, to ask where this is coming from. This is how I can be Christ's life in their lives.
I think about you when I think about this, because you've accomplished this. You love every person who walks into or through your life, and you love them with no reservations and nothing in return, not even politeness or respect, and certainly not love.
Lord, I pray that You may shape my life and Nathan's life to be like Yours, that we may simply pour love into everyone we meet, that we may be Christ's light in the lives of those in Cairo, on my campus. Lord, I pray that we may never burn out as we pour more and more into people and not necessarily get in return the same amount of love, I pray that it may always be you who is keeping our well overflowing.
Nathan, I love you
Christina